Asperger's from the Inside Out
68It's an interesting position to be in. I have a PhD in psychology, and I have Asperger's. Contrary to people's conceptions, there is a lot of information on the internet about Asperger's, and rather than try to come up with my own professional sounding definition and description, I will provide you with links that will give you rich and accurate information.
A way of explaining autism
Yes, I have Asperger's
I have made a study of Asperger's since it became an issue for me. I have talked with dozens of people who have it or thought they had it, and I have read books and online accounts of it. I discovered Asperger's after a therapist told me she thought I had ADHD. It was in the course of looking for resources for ADHD that I discovered the world of Autism and Asperger's. I went from thinking that I was a total screwup to having some hope both of changing things and of having people understand that I am not being rude or insensitive, and I really do not know exactly what I am doing. I started a forum for adults with Asperger's as well as an information site for professionals to come and learn about Asperger's. I advocate for autistic clients seen by the crisis service, and I educated my supervisors, who are awesome about helping me understand where things go wrong.
I will give you a glimpse of the personal side of Asperger's: the social skills issues and their effects on my life, my obsessions and collections and the trouble they've gotten me into, and the particulars of my constellation of Asperger's symptoms, such as sensory integration anomalies, prosopagnosia, hypergraphia (good for hubpages),vestibular stimulation, stimming, food habits, and collecting shiny metal things.
As I said elsewhere I want to keep a positive tone: Asperger's is a disability only because we define it that way. Sometimes it helps to define it as a disability and sometimes that definition is a liability. So bear with me as I reveal for you a very personal part of my life. I will edit this hub carefully and regularly, so be sure to come back and visit and comment. For now I want to keep my promise of starting the hub and giving you relevant good and accurate information. Look for the links to come within a few days.
Social Interaction and Asperger's
This is a good example of what life is like for me. Social interactions are terrible unless I am doing something like public speaking. If I know my topic I can impress an audience, but the moment I attempt a one on one interaction I have to account for all the verbal and non-verbal nuances of communication. Some I miss because I don't know what to look for, and others I miss because while I am trying to keep track of the subject, I miss the other things like voice tone and eye contact, that go with the words.
Interactions that are completely known to me I call scripted. I know what to say and even what the other person is going to say. These happen all the time in my job. But outside of work there is no way of predicting the hundreds of elements of a conversation, and so I tend to fail at those.
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Thanks again for your support. My nephew is diagnosed with AS and he is going into computers. I wish I could but I am dyslexic which makes it quite frustrating. I will get some more hubs up soon!
PS I think my hub on navigating hubpages is a good example of how i seem to have violated some social rule. the first comment was from someone who wanted to know if I cared more about the numbers. I said I wanted to get information out, but today I realized that I *do* care about the numbers. Its another of my obsessions. Now I wonder if he was offended. Sigh. more about obsessions later.
I look forward to reading more. I am glad you see both sides of Asperger's being called a disability. My youngest was recently diagnosed with childhood apraxia of speech and at first I was very, very upset she was being labeled as having a disability (how dare someone try to tell me my beautiful daughter isnt perfect!). But now I realize the term is what will help me get her the help she needs. I still have difficulty knowing her school career will have that notation on her file, but it will help her in the long term.
Shashigai, it can sometimes be difficult to understand a person's intentions from reading what they write (like comments), and I can't imagine factoring in Asperger's when reading comments and trying to figure out the implications behind the words. I read your hub about navigating hubpages along with the comments, and I don't feel that you've violated any social rules or boundaries. :) Plus, what's important to you is a personal thing and not open for others to judge or criticise.
Ardie, I felt the same way. I hate labels, but we are our children's advocates, so as you say, this will allow you to help her overcome any problems she may encounter. She is so fortunate to have a such a strong and smart mom as you. For me, I fought for my son all through school, and now he's in college and doing quite well. There are still issues, but I see light gleaming for him. :)
Wow! Congratulations to your son :) I think the term 'disability' simply means the child may need more guidance...but who doesnt? I could have used more. And thank you for the compliments.
Actually I am glad that I was not diagnosed as a child. I have a high IQ and people focused on that instead. It was expected that I would get an advanced degree. My college friend (I had one) met me years after we graduated and was not surprised that I had a PhD, but she was amazed that I also had learned how to drive! I guess my AS was evident even though it was not diagnosed.
You will laugh at this - it is a common mistake I make. I didn't realize there were implications behind the words. Most of the time I take things at face value, but I have had a lot of negative feedback for my focus on numbers so I thought the person making the comment on my navigating hubpages hub was making the same kind of comment.
Shashigai, what you shared about not realizing implications behind words is exactly the type of thing I need to realize and understand more with my own son. So thank you. :) Of course, it's easier now that he's much older and sometimes he'll ask me if I'm making a joke or being sarcastic or whatever. ;)
Chances are if you would have been diagnosed with anything as a child, you probably would have been misdiagnosed with something else - like the ADHD you mentioned. Correct me if I'm wrong, but Asperger's was only realized or recognized about 13 or 14 years ago. Is that about right? My son was diagnosed at about 14 years old (he's 17 now), and three years has made a huge difference regarding available information and recognition from the medical community about AS.
Ardie, you said it perfectly in that 'disability' simply means a child may need more guidance. :) I actually once heard a principal once say that she wished every kid in school could have an Individualized Education Plan because everyone has different needs. It would be like setting all kids up for success rather than letting many fall through the cracks.
Shashigai, I'm interested in knowing more about vestibular stimulation (exactly what it is) and how it affects you. Does AS cause vestibular problems and make someone feel dizzy and off balance or like things are moving when they aren't?
AS causes one to interpret vestibular stimulation differently - either over or undersensitive to it. I guess dizziness could be a result, though more common symptoms are clumsiness or a desire for intense stimulation. I have so much information, and so many stories about sensory integration issues that I decided to put it in a new hub...
Hi shashigai, I am learning as I read this hub. It does help to understand things and people. And to Pam and Ardie, I am learning from both of your comments as well. Thanks for the interaction.
Vestibular stimulation - Yes! One of my sons literally hates being touched by anyone. I call him my little tag freak, because I have to cut all the tags out of his clothes. He hates the way they make him feel. I forgot to cut a tag out of one of his shirts one day and he wore it to school. By the time he got home that part of his back was bright red and he claimed he could feel it bleeding (even though it wasn't).
My other son loves to cuddle, and hug, he also likes to hold my hand when we go anywhwere outside of our home. At 10 years old he still sleeps with a teddy bear and only likes flannel sheets and arctic fleece blankets. He loves anything about the Army, so, I bought an old Army blanket even though it's wool. I reasoned it would be above his top sheet. He tried it one night and the next day he ranted for hours about how uncomfortable and itchy the blanket was. He removed the blanket and put it away never to be used again.
Wow - I was blown away finding your Hubpage(s) (several of them). I represent Learning Breakthrough Program and was starting to set up a Hubpage and a list of recommended hubs was up on my new page. As I read yours on Sensory Integration and Aspergers (many of our clients are AS) I was struck by how involved and knowledgeable you were on the range of topics that we deal with every day for a number of cognitive challenges. I thank you for your wonderful writing, invite you ta ask questions of me and my organization and perhaps even involve yourself with our program. I would be thrilled to have your knowledgeable support as a resource for myself as I work to make a definitive step forward in telling the world that precise and consistent vestibular stimulation can unlock results hidden behind remarkably simple neurological barriers. Great hubs and great writing! Marc http://www.learningbreakthrough.com/aspergers-synd
Pam Roberson 3 years ago
Thank you so much. You'll never know how much I appreciate this. I think there are probably many who get misdiagnosed in the beginning. And I couldn't agree more that this disorder doesn't have to be viewed as a disability.
One big positive thing I can say about my son that his single-mindedness will serve him well in the field of computers. Well, I can also say that he's very intelligent, sensitive, and quite handsome. ;)
I'll look forward to reading future hubs on this. Thank you!